| April 9, 2001 Guests on this program were: Beth Littleford Jack Kingston Marion Ross Rodney Crowell Panel Discussion Bill: Thank you very much. Let's bring out our panel. Thank you. He is a shining light of country music who lived in his car long before Jewel. [ Laughter ] His autobiographical CD is "The Houston Kid." Rodney Crowell. Rodney, where are ya? [ Cheers and applause ] Hey. Thank you for joining us today. Very much. Rodney: Thank you. Bill: Thank you. Have a seat. The only Republican to represent Georgia's first district since Rreconstruction, Congressman Jack Kingston, one of the good ones. [ Applause ] Jack: Hey, Bill. Good to see you again. Bill: That's right, one of the good ones. She's a former corespondent for Comedy Central's "The Daily Show" and the lovely psycho girlfriend on "Spin City," Beth Littleford. Beth? [ Cheers and applause ] Hey, psycho. Beth: Thank you. Bill: How are you, beautiful? Thank you. And the First Lady of ABC. Wow, you're the First Lady of ABC. That's quite a job. She's Drew's mom on "The Drew Carey Show" and one of the fine stars of the ABC movie "Ladies and the Champ" April 22nd at 7:00, Marion Ross! [ Cheers and applause ] Hello, First Lady. Marion: Hello, precious. Bill: How are you? Marion: Good. Bill: Okay. [ Cheers and applause ] All right. See that? The kids love ya. Marion: Yes. Bill: Exactly. All right, I've been itching to talk about this spy plane thing. We had the kids on last week, so I couldn't. As you unless you live in a cave, you know what happened. One of their pilots, the Chinese pilots, was playing "aerial chicken," as Lieberman called it, with one of our guys, which is only cute if you're Tom Cruise. You know, most people can't pull that off. Beth: Yeah. Marion: Yeah. Bill: And sure enough, accidents happen, and now the Chinese want an apology, and this bothers me because, you know, it looks like a relationship fight to me. Beth: You know what it looks like to me? Bill: Apologize. No. Beth: Two petulant 8-year-olds in a schoolyard standoff. It's just like, cross your fingers behind your back and apologize already. Bill: Yeah, but one side is right. What happened to right and wrong? What happened to Beth: What happened to diplomacy? What happened to diplomacy rather than Bill: We have too much diplomacy. Be a man. George Bush, be a man. Beth: I know, be a man. Bill: Stop apologizing and pussy-footing about it. Beth: Bill, that's how the Vietnam War started. Bill: I thought at least he was a man. I thought at least he was a good ol' boy. Jack: He is. That's why Bill: He's not. Jack: He's not saying, "I'm sorry." Bill, if we apologize, we gotta pay for it. Bill: Exactly. Jack: And if we apologize, we're turnin' our back on Taiwan. If we apologize, we say we're weak on the world stage Beth: But lives hang in the balance. The Vietnam War started over an accident like this. Escalating into there's no need to escalate into this. Jack: China needs us, believe me, on this. Bill: But wait, what happened to who's actually right and wrong? Doesn't that matter in the world anymore? Marion: I agree with you. I think, as liberal as I am, that we should just hold steady on this and Beth: But there are lives in the balance. Marion: Yeah, but this Bill: No, there are not. Marion: A Kung Fu thing, and they Beth: Yes, there are. There's hostages there. Jack: I'm with Mrs. C. [ Laughter ] I'm with Mrs. C. Marion: They are only gonna respect us if we face 'em off, see. [ Talking over one another ] Beth: We're not gonna fold to them in the future. This is something that needs a little diplomacy, need a little velvet glove. Marion: No. Bill: No, no, no. Beth: I'm sorry, but can I just say something? You know George Bush is insecure when he gets in a battle of the big [ bleep ] with the Chinese. [ Laughter ] Like, you don't need to be in a [ bleep ] Bill: Exactly. Beth: with the Chinese. [ Applause ] Bill: Exactly. Beth: This is boyish, it's bravado, I think you need a little velvet glove. Marion: Here's what I think we leave those guys. They're not hurting those guys, they're sitting there. And leave them there two months and let the full range of our press say, "Here's Tibet, here's this." [ Talking over one another ] Bill: First of all, when you're in the Army, when you're in the armed forces, it's a job that incurs danger. You might have to, ooh, God forbid, sit in China near a city that's full of prostitutes for a year. Beth: Okay, fine, but so much more is at stake [ Laughter ] Rodney: You know, I think with George W., to me, it's not about whether it's his first opportunity to be perceived as presidential. I say apologize and get it over with. Beth: No, we did that. [ Talking over one another ] Rodney: Here's a country is it all about perception? If China wants to Beth: Everyone knows we're doing it under duress. Jack: China wants to host the Olympics in the year 2008, they wanna join the World Trade Organization, they wanna have a preferred trade status with us, they need us a lot more than we need them. Bill: Right. Beth: Yeah. Jack: If they wanna behave [ Cheers and applause ] Americans' rights. Beth: But we've also got extremists. We've also I mean, they're very unsteady with the military "is the president gonna stay in power, or is the military gonna take over for our extremists, who say that we're the enemy?" Bill: Are you talking about us or them now? [ Laughter ] Beth: No, there are extremists in China who wanna say, "The U.S. is the enemy, get them off our coast." Bill: Yeah, and they're doing it already. So what? Let them. Beth: Because it's escalating. It's escalating Bill: It's not escalating. Oh, please. Jack: It's not escalating. Bill: You're talking about the panicked Republican in Florida. Marion: But Bill, after it's over [ Laughter ] Bill: It's not escalating. It's nothing. Beth: They should have just been solved Bill: They're sitting in an air-conditioned barracks. They're in the Army. If they have to sit there for five years, then they have to sit there for five years. This is a bigger point. We're not wrong. Beth: What, saving face? We're not wrong? It's boyish, it's childish. Bill: It's not Beth: in kindergarten Bill: Right and wrong is not childish. [ Talking over one another ] Somebody was tail-gating us. Jack: If you apologize, you say you're wrong, then you have to pay the damages, then you have to Bill: Right. Jack: stop doing Bill: Our insurance shouldn't go up. [ Laughter ] Jack: And then you turn your back on Taiwan. This is not just about this plane, this is about trading with Taiwan. And they're trying to buy some missile detectors from us right now, and China is raising hell about it. That's what this is about Bill: It's about moral relativism, also. Every time you say you're sorry when you didn't really do anything, it diminishes every other apology. Apologies for the Holocaust Beth: What are you, 8? I mean, they're just words. They don't mean anything. Rodney: If you're being tail-gated and somebody rear-ends you, and you get out and you wanna fight with them, what have you proved? Beth: Yes, thank you. Bill: This is how women think. Women think, "Just apologize. It didn't matter if you were right or wrong, just apologize and then you can come back in the living room." [ Laughter ] "You don't have to sleep on the couch, just apologize." [ Applause ] Beth: And then don't men do it so they can come and sleep in the bed again? Bill: Yes, and they're wrong. They're [ bleep ], and I don't want our president [ Audience ohs ] Beth: Is that that George Bush not be a [ bleep ]? Bill: And that's what I'm saying, I don't want George Bush to be a [ bleep ], exactly. [ Laughter ] Beth: Bill, that means nothing. In the long run I mean, there's so much more at stake than whether or not our president is a [ bleep ]. Jack: They need us more than we need them. The trade agreement is a one-way street. We buy more from them than they buy from us. Bill: Right. Beth: We have a lot of investments in Bill: There's nothing more important than if your president is a [ bleep ], I'm sorry. [ Laughter ] Bill Clinton was not a [ bleep ]. He liked [ bleep ], but he wasn't a [ bleep ]. [ Laughter and applause ] Beth: Bill Clinton Bill Clinton also moved a little smoother with all this. He had that Marion: Oh, he's done that now for eight years. Beth: No, W. Was not smooth at all about it. Bill: Yeah. Marion: But how about this? After this is over let's say if it takes a year six months I think six months it could be over then I think maybe we don't need this kind of snoop business. Don't we have satellites up there taking pictures? Bill: But we like to do it. Marion: Do we need those low planes embarrassing everybody? Bill: We still do it with the Russians. Even the people Marion: I mean, that would make me mad. Bill: Yeah. [ Talking over one another ] Jack: what's goin' on. Bill: No, no, no. I wanna know what the Chinese are up to. Rodney: Yeah, me, too. Bill: Like they're our friends. Always on Jack: It's a hell of a lot Bill: No, I want to spy on the Chinese. Give me a break. Rodney: But why not apologize and go back to snoopin'? Jack: You can't go back to snoopin' if you do that. If you apologize Beth: Yes, you can! Jack: now you're saying, "I was wrong." Bill: All right. Jack: And then you have to stop doin' it. Bill: I'm sorry, I have to take a commercial. [ Cheers and applause ] Bill: Week two of the Chinese spy plane crisis still no end in sight, and the people at the White House say that President Bush is getting very frustrated at this situation. It's distracting from his domestic agenda. Today, he said, "This economy is not gonna run itself into the ground." [ Laughter ] Bill: George Bush has hired an openly gay man to run the White House AIDS office and is trying to pretend he's comfortable with it. [ Laughter ] Bush Bush said today, "Not only is the first openly gay guy in a Republican White House ever, but he's gonna help us kick off our new energy-saving, work-at-home program." [ Laughter ] [ Applause ] All right, I want to talk about a couple of people who are fighting cancer. One is Suzanne Somers this has been in the news very much lately. Darryl Strawberry also doing it. They each have very unique ways of handling this. Darryl believes in crack. [ Light laughter ] Suzanne who is a frequent guest on our show, and I love her, and I have no doubt she's gonna beat this. There's several things that bother me about this. She's using an alternative therapy. The guy from the American Cancer Society media office said, "We're concerned that Suzanne, perhaps, does not have all the information she needs to make decisions about treating " you know what? Grow up, sir. You know, she's a bright lady. She has the information. Not everyone agrees with traditional medical it wouldn't be the way I would treat my breast cancer. Marion: And it's her breast. Bill: But it's her breast, and she should be able to do whatever she wants. And she could be right. I don't think the American medical establishment is so uncorrupt that they have my 100% faith in them. Beth: It's shocking to me that people even got upset. When I read the "Larry King" transcript, she said, "You know, this is just what I'm doing. I'm not saying anyone else should. I'm not suggesting this to anyone else. I'm trying this and monitoring it." Bill: Okay, so why can't Darryl Strawberry do it his way? This is my question. Beth: I'll tell you why. [ Laughter ] Marion: Well, maybe they should just let him. He wants to die. He obviously wants to die. Bill: Well, he should be able to do that then, too. Marion: He should be able to. Just leave him alone. The damage he does [ Laughter ] The damage he does, though, is he has many wives, many children. I don't know about beating them. Beth: Allegedly allegedly. Arrested for allegedly beating his wife in '90 and a woman he lived with in '93. Arrested, Bill. I know you didn't know this. I'm shocking you with this. Bill: No, I do know this. Beth: You know this? This is bad news. He is harmful. "Hello, harm hotline? Darryl Strawberry." Yeah, he's harmful. [ Laughter ] Bill: First of all, I don't these are alleged crimes. I don't know what he was I don't think he was ever convicted for any of that. Beth: Arrested, charges dropped as is always the case in domestic abuse. Bill: Okay, so, in other words, in America you are [ Applause ] Beth: Thank you, thanks. Bill: Guilty if reported in the press. That's the American justice system. Jack: His problem is, he's broken parole three times, so he's gonna have some legal problems in the state of Florida. The bigger problem, though, is that here's a guy, his identity has been professional baseball, and he's got he's had a kidney removed, he's had part of his colon removed. You know, basically, he's down and out, and I don't know how hard we need to be kicking somebody like that right now. Steven Howe, who was his teammate with the New York Yankees, failed the drug test seven times, and he's up and about. He's been drug-free for about ten years. So, you know, the law is gonna apply to him, because the law has to apply equally, but the Bill: Well, why should it? Why should the law step in? Jack, can you Beth: Because he gets in traffic accidents. Bill: Traffic accidents? Well, then I guess we should make liquor illegal because, you know, people get and get into traffic accidents. [ Cheers and applause ] Yeah, that's the point. It's the driving badly that's Beth: It's harming other people. His drug use is harming other people. Bill: No, he is not harming anyone else. That's a lie. Beth: He's doing drugs and hitting women. He's doing drugs allegedly and being a deadbeat dad. He's doing drugs and getting behind the wheel. That hurts other people. Bill: Well, then we should make liquor illegal, too, because people get drunk and beat their wife. Beth: Well, bingo. They do. Bill: So liquor should be illegal? Beth: We should press harder for the stuff not to drive under the influence. Bill: That's different. That's not what they're arresting him for. Jack: He's in trouble for the drugs, not for the wife. Now, he probably should be in trouble for the wife, but that's not why he's in the news right now. Rodney: Well, he's in trouble 'cause he's sick. Beth: Yeah, 'cause he's using drugs and breaking parole. [ Applause ] Bill: So a sick person, with this drug, has to deal with the law. A sick person with another drug has to deal with a doctor. That's what America is about. If you pick the wrong drug, you deal with a cop. [ Cheers and applause ] Jack: Also, Bill Also it goes beyond that. In our office, we have a lot of people who want to use nontraditional forms of medicine, particularly people who want to go to Greece for cancer treatments that aren't available in the United States. And they would get in trouble if they tried to do that in America. So, if using a drug for medicinal purposes is wrong, could get you in trouble with the law Marion: You mean they can't go to Greece and do that? Jack: They're not supposed to. Marion: Who's gonna stop them? Jack: Well, that's why they have to go to Greece, and then they can Rodney: Is there any way to make sure Bill: There you go. Jack: They ought to do it back home. Bill: Because they lobby. Because they pay money. Rodney: What if she's successful? Because they pay their bribes. Rodney: What if she kicks cancer successfully using alternative medicine? What does that say about the AMA? Bill: It would mean they'd have to up their bribes because they'd be in big trouble. Jack: Would they? Bill: Exactly. Well, to give you one example of that, many more teenagers use alcohol than marijuana. But you never hear a word against drinking with the kids. It's always pot with the kids. Beth: I know, but pot you're loving somebody. You're getting drunk, and you're hitting someone. You're smoking a little of the ganj, and you're loving 'em. I mean, that's the difference. The danger really is abusing alcohol, rather than abusing Bill: Well, then why does the $195 million government campaign against Beth: I'm with ya. Bill, I'm with ya. [ Light laughter ] I just think Darryl Strawberry does harm other people. I mean your question I think was, "Who's he doing harm to?" He's doing harm to the kids Marion: He can't help it, though. He's sick. Beth: and the ladies he's with. Bill: The ladies that he's with? You talk about him like he's O.J. Simpson. I don't know what happened that one time. Beth: I saw a chronology on him that was shocking and horrifying arrested for alleged spousal abuse, for deadbeat dad stuff? Jack: "Alleged"? Beth: Well, I have to say that, 'cause I'm on a show, and they told me to say "Alleged." But I mena, if they're arrests, I think we know, kids. Jack: But I don't think there have been any arrests for spouse abuse. I think it was probably Beth: He was arrested he and his wife '90, he was arrested for hitting his wife. Bill: First of all, if you hit your wife Beth: in '93, a woman he lives with. Jack: You have studied up on this. Beth: I'm horrified. Bill: That's the crime, is hitting your wife. It has nothing to do guys hit their wives sober and drunk. Beth: Much more often under the influence. Bill: Let's not blame the crack, shall we? Beth: Much more often under the influence. Bill: It's not about the crack. [ Cheers and applause ] Jack: And if he did do it, he should be he should go to jail for that. Beth: Thank you. Marion: It's interesting, as you say, you cannot go to Greece and take an alternative [ Laughter ] Jack: I said that wrong. You cannot take the medicine in America, so you have to leave your loved ones to go to Greece to take the medicine even though you've studied all about it, even if you're a doctor here, and you know all about medicine, you can't take it in America, even at your own will. Bill: It's not a free country. That's the truth, Jack. It's not a free country. [ Cheers and applause ] And, since you're our representative in Washington, I'd like you to personally change this. Jack: Let me tell you another thing you can't do. If you go to Canada or Mexico to buy lipitor for your high cholesterol, because it's a lot less expensive there, The exact same company, made by the same pharmaceutical company in America same drugs it's cheaper in Mexico or Canada, and it's against the law to go over there and buy it. Beth: AMA, They're powerful. They're very powerful. Jack: But we are gonna change that law. Bill: Oh, really? Jack: Yes, we are. [ Applause ] Bill: I don't know who "we" is, Jack. But you know very well, as I do, that the pharmaceutical companies have poured a lot of money into Republican coffers and have gotten their way on everything. Jack: They overlook my coffers, though, and we are gonna change that. Bill: Okay, we gotta take a break. We'll be back. [ Cheers and applause ] Announcer: Join us this week on "Politically Incorrect," when Bill's guests will include "Monty Python's" Eric Idle, "Survivor" castoff Jerri Manthey, actress June Lockhart and actor Tom Arnold. Bill: Pamela and Tommy Lee have gotten back together. You're probably gonna think this is a repeat, but no, this just came up before. In a statement, Ms. Lee said that her decision was prompted by mutual respect, a concern for their children, and then she said, "Ah, who am I kidding? You've all seen his penis." [ Laughter ] [ Applause ] Okay. All right, now, Republican of Georgia, the floor wants to talk about Strom Thurmond. He got a this guy has got to go, Jack. You gotta do something about Strom Thurmond. [ Applause ] It's not funny anymore. Jack: The only people who are greatly bothered about Strom Thurmond are liberals, who never liked strom Thurmond. He's got 99% voting attendance record. Bill: He is 99. [ Laughter ] Jack: Well, he's got a better voting Bill: He's got a percentage for every year. Jack: Ted Kennedy. Beth: He's joined the Klan when it was still considered cool. [ Laughter ] Marion: I think Strom Thurmond should apologize for being so old. Jack: And living so long. Rodney: He was a liberal [ Talking over one another ] he would be the darling of the Eastern elitist Beth: But there's nothing darling about that man. [ Talking over one another ] Rodney: No, remember Jack: People are voting for him. Beth: Yeah, and you know what? Put him behind glass, let them go to museums and look at him. [ Laughter ] Jack: Listen, he's a very he's a very virile man. When he was 66 years old, he married Miss South Carolina, who was only 22. He became a father when he was 73. Beth: Hugh Hefner Bill: But the problem is Jack: You ought to be proud of him. [ Laughter ] Bill: The problem is that he still thinks he's married to that woman, and they haven't been married for ten years 'cause he's cuckoo. [ Laughter ] He said, "My wife could take over," and somebody had to remind him, "Senator, you haven't been married for ten years." [ Laughter ] Jack: Hey, Bill, one thing nice about being in the U.S. Senate, you can be a little cuckoo. As long as you're re-elected, you can continue with that. That's why the Democrats voted down the tax cut. [ Audience Ohhs ] "I did it." I just think that would go over real big here, but I just thought I mean, at least 50% of 'em are. Bill: It's not about Rodney: I think he's good for morale there. It's humorous. Beth: Get a chuckle. Rodney: Its entertainment value think about the gig. Jack: Bill [ Laughter ] Bill: That is not there for our entertainment, there's only 100 of them. Jack: Remember this I mean, think serious. Beth: Yes, 'cause I say, why not try to get, like, a third or fourth woman in there rather than I mean, what do we have, 97 old, wrinkled white men? Bill: No. Rodney: No. Beth: I mean, whatever. It's just so predictable. [ Applause ] Bill: Women, they always complain, but they don't really know the facts about politics. Jack: While we're all criticizing Strom Thurmond, keep in mind, even though Beth: Jim Crow was his barber? Jack: He was in the Normandy invasion, he got a Purple Heart, he has an honorable war record, and he is American Bill: Yeah, he's got a purple rectum now, is the problem. [ Laughter ] He's a crazy, sick old guy. Beth: Did you hear my joke? Jack: Where is your sense of patriotism? You should get a tear in your eye [ Talking over one another ] Bill: Where's yours? What about getting rid of people who aren't qualified Jack: I'll admit, I like it, the 99% [ Applause ] The 99% voting record is probably 99% Republican, so I realize Bill: Yeah. Jack: that might be offensive to some, but in South Carolina, they think it's great, and we really enjoy it. Bill: I mean, you could stick a Chucky doll up there and just vote. [ Laughter ] Beth: Remarkably Bill: I mean, just to vote. Just know what he's voting for. Jack: I didn't hear all the Democrats raising cain about Claude Pepper, and he wasn't exactly a spring chicken when he was in Congress, and he was in there for about 40 or 50 years. Bill: All right. Jack: And everybody's, "Oh, isn't this great?" Bill: All right, well Jack: "Senior citizen out there." But he was a liberal, so Bill: Okay, I have to take a break. You're gonna win anyway. Beth: Did you hear my joke? [ Cheers and applause ] [ Applause ] Bill: We were right about the plane again. Okay, tomorrow, Eric Idle, Esai Morales, Brooke Burke and Lionel Chetwynd. | |
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